


wino

by duchess_of_shipping



Category: Little Shop of Horrors - Menken/Ashman
Genre: Drunk!Audrey, Drunken Shenanigans, F/M, Poor Seymour, audrey is PLASTERED in this one, flustered boi
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-08
Updated: 2019-07-08
Packaged: 2020-06-24 19:00:54
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,179
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19729846
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/duchess_of_shipping/pseuds/duchess_of_shipping
Summary: audrey drowns her sorrows in liquor after a hard night in the gutter, and seymour is left to take care of his friend...not that he minds. really, he doesn't.(pre musical little ship one shot. hope y'all like it, since it's my first time writing for these two and this fandom uwu)





	wino

**Author's Note:**

> hey so i love little shop of horrors so damn much, as well as little ship (our ship name for seymour/audrey), so i thought i would write this little bit of fluff! hope you guys like it, cause i sure enjoyed writing it!)

Audrey Fulquard sniffled, sitting in her dressing room as she dabbed at her eyes so the other dancers in The Gutter wouldn’t see her crying. They never did like it when she cried, thought she looked like a drowned rat with botox and weren’t afraid to say so.

Her late shift had ended, and even though she usually hated it, this night was just a little worse. 

Earlier, while she was serving drinks, a man had shoved his hand up her fluffy skirt. Later on, while she was dancing on the stage, a guy had reached out to grab her leg and pull her to him, and his ring caught on her guarder and ripped her slip.

And if that hadn’t been enough, she’d broken a nail trying to defend herself from a drunken customer that had gotten a little too handsy and a little too angry when she rebuffed his advances (she shouldn’t have done that; as soon as she felt her irritation reach a fever pitch and felt her own clawed hand grab his wrist and wrench his hand off of her hip, she knew she had made a mistake. _Stupid, stupid Audrey,_ she thought).

So yes, her night hadn’t been the best. She knew it wasn’t the worst she’d ever endured, but she still felt so ugly and used and pathetic and _Jesus H Christ, Audrey, ya never learn, do ya?!_

Eventually, one of the other dancers, Chiffon, came up to Audrey and placed a warm, comforting hand on the battered girl’s shoulder.

“I don’t think you’re fit to go home, honey.” Chiffon says, a small glimmer of pity in her eyes as Audrey turned to her with an artificial smile.

“Oh, thank you Chiffon, but I’m alright! Just a little knick.” Audrey assured, spinning back around with a little nod of her blonde head to tend to a slash mark along her cheek she’d acquired from a different drunken man’s ring. Crystal, another dancer, bends down gently on Audrey’s left.

“We ain’t talkin’ ‘bout the scratch on your cheek, honey; We talkin’ ‘bout the scratches in here.” Her blue-tipped claws tapped Audrey’s chest gently, right where her heart would be. Audrey smiled happily, if a bit artificially. 

“Really, I’m fine.” Audrey assured again, though her voice cracked a little on ‘fine’. Ronnette, the last member of the trio, clapped her hands happily.

“Ooh, I know what’ll make her feel better!” She exclaims. “A drink!”

“Oh, no no no, I don’t drink-” Audrey was cut off.

“Ah, c’mon, girl! You need to unwind after the night you just had!” Crystal grabs Audrey’s hands and gently pulls her up. Audrey looks between all three girls before another smile, this one softer and much more genuine than the one she plastered on all night, spread onto the blonde’s face.

“Oh-OK.” Audrey giggles a little, and the trio of girls celebrate a little before they lead her out of the dressing rooms and into the closed bar for a little drink among colleagues.

Hell, after a night like this, a girl like Audrey needed something to unwind and loosen her up.

____________________________________________________________________________

Unfortunately, _something_ turned into _many somethings._

(Audrey was entirely sure she’d only agreed to one, but then the whole in her heart got smaller and smaller with every shot that burned its way down her throat, and she felt herself getting higher and higher until she felt she could touch the sky and grab God by his robe and shake him until he finally paid for all of _that_ that he’s put her through-)

She felt herself sway as she braced herself against the bar on her way off of her stool.

“Honey, you OK?” Chiffon, who barely drank at all, asked quizzically.

“M-Mhmm! Neva betta!” Audrey slurred before she hiccuped, followed by another wobbly giggle. The girls all swapped looks.

“Audrey, I think you should-”

“I-I’m good, I’m good~” Audrey replies, wobbling on her heels before she practically throws herself at the door and pushes it open. “I’ll-” _Hiccup._ “I’ll see you tomorrow night, girls! Thanks for the drinks…!”

And with that, Audrey had managed to stumble out of the bar with a pearl of intoxicated giggles following the rapid clicking of her heels on dirty gravel.

“Someone get ‘er, someone get ‘er!” Ronnette says worriedly, and the other girls rush out of the bar to try to catch up to her, but to no avail.

For some reason, drunk Audrey was fast as hell.

“You just had to give her alcohol, didn't you?” Chiffon rolls her eyes.

“Hey! It was Ronnette’s idea!” Crystal frowns. Ronnette glares at her, raising her fist as if she meant to punch Crystal out for her remark, and Crystal returned the glare tenfold.

“Why, I outta-!” Ronnette snarls, rearing her fist back. 

“Both of you stop it back there! We gotta find Audrey!” Chiffon turns to them sharply, giving both of the girls heated glares. 

As if to answer Chiffon’s remark, the girls heard a far away but still audible _‘SEYMOUR~!_ followed by a wimpy-sounding grunt.

“I think someone already found her.” Ronnette says, snickering a little.

“We betta make sure it’s actually that little jerk and not some creep who kinda looks like him.” Chiffon replies resolutely, marching off towards the shrill squeak of Audrey.

“He ain’t already a creep?” Ronnette asks. Crystal frowns, flicking the back of Ronnette’s head in exasperation.

____________________________________________________________________________

Seymour Krelborn was walking along Skid Row, a big bag of plant food in his small hands as he struggled to keep both the bag and himself upright. Seymour knew he never had much strength growing up, and even after growing up, but this was a bit much.

Speaking of a bit much, Seymour had no idea how wild of a night he was about to have until he felt someone crash into him heavily.

“SEYMOUR~!” Audrey trilled, clicking over to Seymour happily and slamming all of her weight into him. Seymour grunted on impact, dropping the plant food swiftly onto the dirty ground so he could steady her.

“A-Audrey…!?” Seymour stammered out, hands gentle yet firm on her biceps so she wasn’t wobbling around so much. Audrey let out a tiny giggle upon laying eyes on Seymour once again.

“Hiiiya, Seymooouuurrrr~” She giggled out, nails digging into his jacket. He looked her over worriedly.

“Audrey, what’s wrong? Ya look…” Seymour didn’t want to say terrible, because in his mind, Audrey could never look terrible, but if she could…

This would probably be the closest she could come to it.

Mascara streaked her cheeks, her eyeshadow was spread out along her eyelids and even atop her eyebrows, her lipstick was streaked across her cheek, and her hair was mussed up. She was even drooling a little.

But still, this was Audrey, his friend, and she clearly needed help.

“Ya look like ya’ve had a rough night.” Seymour replies finally, peering sadly up at her. Audrey loses her loopy smile, frowning a bit.

“I did…” She sighs before she perks back up again. “But now I’m OK, because _you’re_ here!”

“M-Me…?” Seymour asks as she threw her arms around his neck and damn near showered him with kisses.

“Mhmm! Ya just so sweet, and funny, and cute, and...and…ya listen ta me! Like really listen ta me!...and...and...” Audrey struggled to think of something else to say that complimented Seymour, something that encompassed all of the good that this man held, and tears welled up in her eyes. Soon, she started full on bawling.

“A-Audrey!? W-What’s wrong?” He asks, arms hesitantly around her back so she didn’t fall to the ground as she crumpled in on herself. Audrey heaved out sobs in an admittedly comical way, face a mess, lip quivering, and snot running down her face from her flared nostrils.

“Ya just...ya just so...ya just so Seymooouuurrrr~! Ya so great~!!” Audrey cries out, burying her face deeply into his neck. 

“And I love Seymooooouuuurrrrr~!!!” She continues into his neck, squeezing him admittedly a little too tight, so tight he actually wheezes.

“Ya…” _Wheeze._ “Y-Ya do…?” Seymour gasped out. Audrey sobs, nodding.

“Uh huh!” She wails. 

“B-But ya can’t tell Seymour I like him...like really reallyyyyy like him...He won’t like me anymore…” She hiccups.

Seymour’s mind reels as Audrey’s drunken words and vice grip tumble around in his head. 

_Audrey...thinks I’m cute?_

_Audrey...Audrey might actually like me?_

_Oh no! Audrey thinks Seymour-_ I _-won’t like her anymore…!_

However, before he can assure her that he’d like her just the same no matter what, Audrey’s mood changes again like the drop of a hat, and she’s back to hugging onto him with a vice grip. She sways him side to side and crushes him to her chest in the hug.

“S-Seymour, where’d you gooooo~? I missed yaaaaa~!” Audrey whines, hugging him around the neck with her chin on his head as they sway. Seymour, against his desire to stay in Audrey’s arms, pulls away with his hands on her biceps as her fingers toy with his jacket collar idly.

“I-I think we should get you home, Audrey.” Seymour replies with a worried expression, setting his hand hesitantly on her ribs to support her weight. Audrey wrapped her arms around his shoulders and craned her neck to lay her head on his shoulder with a happy sigh.

“You smell nice~” Audrey hums, nuzzling into the collar of his jacket.

“W-What?” He asks, dumbfounded.

“You smell like...like…” Audrey takes another light sniff. “Like flowahs…I like flowahs...”

“Well...I…” He felt his cheeks flush red as he floundered for something to say. It's not often a pretty girl, especially one as amazing as Audrey, complimented how he smelled.

“Thank you, Audrey.” Audrey giggles merrily at his response, seeming content to just have her entire weight on him and her body as coiled around him as she could get while still standing.

The two walked (well, Seymour did most of the walking; Audrey couldn’t keep track of moving in a straight line and decided to just lay herself on Seymour to save the trouble) in mostly silence, with Audrey making comments like _“Where’d you get your glasses?” “How’d you get so cute?” “Do you have a girlfriend…?...I hope you don’t have a girlfriend...” “Your eyes are really nice...they’re blue, but gray...I like em…”_ and Seymour answering as best he could as his cheeks flamed brighter the more compliments Audrey slurred out.

Eventually, the walk quieted completely, and soon Audrey stopped moving of her own accord; instead, it was more like Seymour was dragging her weaving form around.

“Audrey…?” Seymour asks worriedly. No response. 

“...Audrey???” Still nothing. 

He shifted a little, and just as he’d thought (or hoped), Audrey was just knocked out, snoring deeply and slumped onto him with her head bobbing listlessly in the air.

He examined her with a light frown before he groans. 

_Oh no,_ Seymour sighs inwardly, looking down at her drunken, sleeping face with a look of worry and slight exasperation. _I’m going to have to carry her to her apartment…_

Seymour looked around the noisy and dirty city; Audrey’s apartment was too far to get to, what with Audrey completely knocked out, and even if it wasn’t, getting Audrey safely up the stairs of her building and keeping her steady and walking wouldn’t be an easy feat. And yet, he couldn’t just leave her on the street; God only knows what would happen to her then.

So the only option he had...was the shop.

Seymour stood and thought worrying his lip while gently gripping Audrey to his side before he sighs and resolves that it’s the only place he can go that he’s sure he can get her to and keep her even a little bit safer…

Even if Mr. Mushnik’s wrath would be hell to pay.

“OK, Audrey,” Seymour sighs out. “I'm’ gonna pick you up now, and take you to the shop. If you are not OK with that, I’m going to need you to let me know somehow.” Seymour prods gently, arms around Audrey’s waist so she didn’t fall over. 

“...Audrey?” He looked at her, waiting for some kind of reaction…

And then she snored. Loudly.

_Guess that answers that..._ >He thinks. 

“Here goes nothin’…” Seymour speaks to himself with a sigh that makes his shoulders sag. 

Bending down, Seymour slips his hands gently under her knees and back and hoists her up. He grunts, feeling his knees buckle under the worryingly low weight of Audrey and his own lack of strength, but he manages.<

She bobbed listlessly in the air as she half clung to, half hung from Seymour’s frame. She murmured when she heard something that resembled her name in her mind, and groaned if jostled too much or momentarily removed from Seymour’s warmth, but other than that she stayed perfectly asleep until they reached Mushnik’s. 

Quietly, Seymour set Audrey halfway on the ground as he fished his keys out of his pocket. Unlocking the door to the shop as quickly as he could despite the loud jingling of the keys and Audrey’s talon-like nails digging into his shoulders for support, Seymour rushed in and hoped that the trek from the main room of the store to his cot in the basement didn’t wake Mr. Mushnik. If it did, he would almost certainly yell at him, and that would wake Audrey up. 

Yet nothing happened, and Seymour sighed in relief before he swung Audrey fully back into his arms again. She made a slight _‘wheee’_ noise in her sleep at the motion, but otherwise stayed put as Seymour carefully carried her down the stairs to his ‘bedroom’. 

“Audrey?...We’re here.” Seymour hums gently, placing her down on the cot. Audrey curled up against the cold temperature of the uninsulated room with her hands rubbing fiercely at her biceps to keep warm as she murmurs sleepily. 

“Are you...are you OK?” Seymour asks, looming over her like a mother hen after she mumbles in her sleep. 

Then he hears a gag. 

His eyes widen as Audrey sprung out of bed, heels clicking and ankles twisting as she runs towards the bathroom (even while drunk, she knew the layout of Seymour’s room; it was her favorite room in the world, and she knew it like the back of her hand). 

The next thing he hears from the depressingly small bathroom of the room is repeated gagging and spitting, and the sound of slop hitting water. 

He winces at the sounds, and at Audrey’s pitiful groans. He follows behind her, looming again as she throws up. Her shoulders heave with every bout of bile leaving her throat, and her hair billows around her dangerously close to touching the vomit on the toilet seat. 

Seymour bends down, hands gently brushing her neck as he lifts up her perfect hair so it doesn’t touch the vomit and the gross toilet water. Audrey continues to throw up with groans and mutters, and Seymour stays back with her soft and silky hair splayed dutifully between his fingers. 

Eventually, Audrey stops throwing up, and she slumps over the toilet with a groan. Seymour looks over worriedly, hands still softly holding her hair back. 

“...Audrey?” Seymour asks with a frown, leaning over her to try to see if she’s OK. 

_Then he hears another snore from her._

__

__

This time however, Seymour snickers softly, head tipped back in silent amusement at Audrey’s drunken antics and clinginess. Even still, he can’t leave the poor girl on the toilet like this. 

“Audrey? I’m going to pick you up now, and putcha back on the cot. That OK?” He asks, a smile on his face. 

__Snore._ _

Seymour shook his head with a smile. 

“Guess that's a yes again.” He laughs to himself, crouching down to pick her up again as she snored and murmured in her sleep. 

Seymour softly guides her arm around his shoulders as he slips his own arms under her back and knees again. Seymour takes her back to the cot and places her there as gently as he could, and this time, she curls up again and stays snoring and peacefully asleep. 

Seymour smiles down at her fondly as she slumbers, knees tucked to her chest and face a peaceful blank slate. 

“Oh Audrey,” He laughs lightly. “What am I gonna do with you?”

She snores in response, shivering and curling in tighter on herself against the cold of the room.

His smile turns worried, and he looks around the room for something to warm her up with, but he doesn’t see anything that will do the job.

Then he remembers the jacket that adorns him.

He takes off his jacket swiftly, examining the thick red garment before he nods approvingly. _This will do,_ he smiles.

Going over to Audrey again, Seymour places the jacket on Audrey gently, and he’d be lying if he said his heart didn’t flutter and ache at the same time when he sees her curl up in it and nuzzle her strong nose in the fabric lovingly.

_Oh Audrey, what am I going to do with you?_

He swiftly averts his eyes away from her, feeling more and more like the creeps that harass and demean her every day the longer he watched his best friend sleep. Swiftly and quietly so as not to wake her, he left his basement and shut the door behind him.

Seymour, once alone, finally allows himself to blush, heart pounding against his ribs incessantly as he stands in the main room of the shop alone in the dead of night. Audrey was in his room, cuddled into his jacket.

_...And she said she liked me._

As soon as the thought entered his head, Seymour batted it away; she was probably just really grateful that he’d saved her and let her sleep in his bed for the night. After all, if he hadn’t come across her, she could’ve been in serious danger.

_The thought of someone taking advantage of her, when she wasn’t in her right mind no less, made his stomach clench and his blood boil._

Besides, and not to discredit Audrey or her feelings (he’d never dream of doing that), she was out of her mind and more than a little drunk. She might’ve just been talking out of her head; it happens.

Seymour sighed in exhaustion, rubbing a hand down his face. He really needed the sleep, or else Mushnik would have his ass if he was sluggish and tired and couldn’t stay awake (even if they never had customers anyway…).

Seymour looks around the room, going over to the counter for refuge for the night and curling up under it. His knees are to his chest to fit in the cramped space, and the cold steel of the counter bites into his back, but he has a smile on his face all the same.

_Even still...she might just like me..._

With that thought in his head, and the knowledge that Audrey is safely sleeping downstairs, he allows himself to drift off. His slumber that night is, not surprisingly, filled with dreams of Audrey as his wife, with two darling kids that looked just like them, living in a little house with a toaster and an abundance of plant life. _Green...Somewhere that’s green…_

____________________________________________________________________________

The next morning, Audrey’s head is pounding in her sleep.

She makes a whining sound low in her throat, sitting up and rubbing her head as she blinks the sleep away from her eyes.

As the world comes into focus around her, she realizes where she is with a stark yet quiet gasp. Her eyes are wide and her mouth agape as the various, bizarre potted plants, botanical journals, and dingy, dusty walls come into view.

 _I’m in Seymour’s room!_ She realizes, looking around the room frantically. _But...how’d I get here…?_

As she thought of last night, bits and pieces filtered through her hung over mind; shoving a guy off of her, getting a split lip, getting hammered out of her ass like the absolute idiot she was, stumbling home a giggling mess…

“Well, I didn’t exactly go home, did I…?” She frowns to herself, looking around the room. Her hand ran through her messy blonde hair as she thought, squinting as she tried to piece together everything that happened last night…

And then she saw the jacket around her body.

She held the bright red fabric up, the color slightly irritating her eyes from how bright it was. Even still, she knew whose it was, and would recognize it anywhere, even in a sea of similarly colored jackets.

This was undoubtedly Seymour’s jacket.

She feels her cheeks heat up, even if she knew that there was no possible way they...had an encounter the night before; she was still wearing her dress, heels, stockings, and makeup (even if it was smudged and messed up all to hell, and even if some of it stained his pillows and sheets...she’d had to wash them herself to apologize), and the bed was largely undisturbed…

And Seymour was nothing like the guys she could’ve ran into. Seymour was sweet and kind, and had probably carried her here after seeing her make an ass out of herself like she usually did (You never learn, do you, Audrey?!).

No. Seymour wouldn’t have taken advantage of her.

...But then where was he?

Slowly, Audrey planted her feet on the creaking ground and stood up with a groan. Her stomach lurched, but she didn’t throw up the contents of it or lack thereof, and her head swam, and everything was fuzzy and too vibrant, but she stood up and pressed on anyway.

Her legs felt like lead as the world lurched around her, and her heels felt like spinning tops. Even still, she grabbed the railing of Seymour’s rickety stairs and hauled herself up one step at a time.

Finally, Audrey got to the top of the stairs and threw open the door. The sound of her heels on the ground irritated her and grated on her eardrums, but she walked around the lobby of the shop anyway in search of her friend.

...And then she walked past the counter and heard his quiet snores.

Audrey whipped around, stumbling over to the counter and peering behind it to see Seymour sound asleep, curled up like a kitten with his curly brown hair tossed around his face. His fists were balled by his face, and his eyelashes fluttered against his cheeks in erratic patterns. He was even smiling softly in his slumber.

He really is such a cutie. Audrey thought with a fond smile, heart quickly melting at the sight of her best friend curled up and looking peaceful for once...even if his hair was covering his eye and tossed around his face like a rat’s nest.

Then again, her hair can’t look much better.

Against her better judgement, she reaches out a hand and gently moves his hair out of his face, marveling at how soft the curls of his hair were. _There. All better._

She gets up from the ground, frowning as she looked around the room for a bit before she grabbed a pen and a small piece of paper. Shakily and hurriedly, she scribbled out a thank you note for Seymour and placed it on his head before she stumbled out of the shop and into the early morning streets of Skid Row.

It’s hours like this where she could almost like living here, when it’s quiet and blanketed by dark morning clouds. When the air is cold, and she’s completely alone and safe for all the predators are asleep.

She shivers in the morning air as she stumbles back to her apartment in her irritatingly clicking heels. The breeze is biting and unforgiving, and she draws her jacket around her tightly to try to keep herself warm-

_Wait. That’s not right._

Halfway back to her apartment, standing in the middle of the empty street like an idiot, she realizes that she took off with Seymour’s jacket without a second thought, and now she would have to walk all the way back and give it back to him.

_...Or would she?_

The jacket felt warm and safe, and Seymour would want her to be warm and safe wouldn’t he? He’d want her to feel secure and sleep her hangover off, right? Yeah…

And besides, Audrey thought as she continued onto her apartment, walking up the stairs absently as a smile quickly spread onto her face. Her fingers tightened in the fabric as she bundled herself up tightly in it. If she really inhaled the fabric, she could even smell him. 

Sweet and unassuming, the scent was. Like a carnation.

_I’ll give it back. I really will._

As she laid across her little bed and curled up in the jacket of her best friend, and the love of her life, Audrey briefly wondered who she thought she was fooling.


End file.
